Keeping Up With the Kissingers: November 2021

Jack’s Birth Story

Full Name: John Stephen Kissinger

Name Meaning: Jack is named after his grandfathers. Brian’s dad - Donald John and Courtney’s dad - Stephen Eugene. John/Jack means “God is gracious”. We thank the Lord who has been so gracious to us, and blessed us with so many children. St. John the Baptist is his patron saint. Especially as we enter the season of Advent in the coming days, we look to John the Baptist to help us prepare our lives for the coming of Christ Jesus. Stephen means “crown; victorious” – St. Stephen was the first Christian martyr.

Jack has traditionally been used as a nickname for John in our extended family – for example, Courtney’s great-uncles Jack on both the Laffin and Parker side. According to WhyCenter.com, Jack is a nickname for John because of the influence of the Germanic tongues during the 17^th century. Some letters in the English alphabet are in sound different to the German alphabet. “John” was therefore pronounced as “Jackin” or “Jankin” and it was relatively easy to use “Jack” after such nicknames had sprung up. Having lived in a German-speaking country for over 6 years and continually mispronouncing German words – Courtney could appreciate this story & liked the idea of calling our little Austrian-born boy “Jack”.

Birthday: Saturday, November 13, 2021 at 9:43 pm

Stats: 9 lb, 1 oz (4115 g); 21 inches (54 cm)

Place of Birth: Scheibbs, Austria

When Brian and I got married, we knew we wanted to have a lot of kids – ultimately, whatever number God wanted to send us. When we became pregnant with our first, we named her Elliana meaning “God has heard us/answered our prayer.” God has continued to be so gracious with us – blessing us with 7 children so far, five we’ve been able to meet here on earth and two more we lost in miscarriage who we look forward to being reunited with in heaven someday. Due to the fact I’ve had two miscarriages and because I had bleeding in the first trimester with Isaac and Clare, which caused us to end up in the ER where I was put on progesterone, I wanted to do something proactively to avoid those situations if possible. God answered that prayer as my neighbor, who is a good friend, here in Gaming became a Creighton Model FertilityCare practitioner/teacher. (https://creightonmodel.com/) Brian and I were able to use the Creighton Model to track my cycles, I had bloodwork done at certain points during each cycle, and we met with a NaPro doctor in Vienna who prescribed progesterone for me to take prior to conceiving. After about 7 months of using with Creighton, we were thrilled to see the word “Schwanger” appear on the pregnancy test! I actually ended up taking the test at 3 AM, after saying the night before that I wanted to wait a couple of days before I tested, but then the suspense got to both of us and we were both awake so I tested and it was joyfully positive! I entrusted this little one to the Sacred Heart of Jesus upon learning of his existence!

When I was 9 weeks pregnant, we got to see the baby for the first time on the ultrasound! This was our first time meeting our new OBGYN. She was recommended to us by friends because of her involvement in the pro-life community. Her office was in Vienna, but it was worth the drive for the appointments as we felt very comfortable with her and she spoke English! The due date was set for November 16. This baby would be our “tiebreaker” - deciding whether we had more girls or boys, and red heads or blondes.

At 12 weeks, we had an ultrasound performed at the Scheibbs hospital, about 20 minutes from our house, where I had given birth to Isaac and Clare – and would ultimately give birth to this baby.

At 16 weeks, we had another check-up with our OBGYN. In Austria, it’s standard practice to do an ultrasound at each appointment. During this ultrasound, we found out we were having a boy! Once we knew he was a boy, the big remaining “tiebreaker” question was whether he’d have red hair!

My pregnancy proceeded quite uneventfully, which was great; I never had any bleeding during this pregnancy. Of course, there was the pandemic going on. When I was 25 weeks, the two leading American organizations representing specialists in obstetric care recommended that all pregnant women be vaccinated against COVID-19. My OBGYN gave me the same recommendation at that point in my pregnancy. I wanted to get vaccinated to build up antibodies for me (and possibly the baby) in case I encountered the virus, so at 26 and 29 weeks I received the Pfizer vaccine.

At 36 weeks, I saw my OBGYN for the last time. That is standard practice here in Austria. At 38 weeks, I went to the hospital in Scheibbs where I would deliver to meet with the midwives and to have another ultrasound. Everything looked good. The doctor said to come back for my next appointment one day after my due date OR whenever my contractions started. I laughed and said I’d definitely be back after my due date as I had never had a baby early and couldn’t imagine doing so!

When I was 39 weeks, Ellie was home from school because one of her classmates had tested positive for COVID. The kids in Volksschule, where Francis and Ellie attend school, test 3 times per week. At first I was nervous when we got the call that her classmate had tested positive, but it ended up being great having her home most of that week – I enjoy her company and she’s a big help with her younger siblings. She ended up testing negative and returned to school on Thursday, November 11, St. Martin’s Day. When she returned to school, however, the other half of her class was absent due to another positive case. The entire second grade was out as well due to positive cases in the class. So we definitely knew that COVID was present in the school, but Ellie and Francis continued to test negative.

On Saturday, November 13, I got out of bed around 7:30 AM after a restful night of sleep. I had been having Braxton Hicks contractions for a few weeks, and I had definitely felt them late Friday/early Saturday – but nothing that kept me awake. As we got ready for 9 AM Mass, I did think that the Braxton Hicks contractions felt different. They were a bit stronger, they felt very low and would make me at least pause when they occurred. I thought it was possible that the baby was dropping and that perhaps the head was rotating to get into proper position. During this pregnancy, Brian and I had watched the Spinning Babies Parents Class (https://www.spinningbabies.com/), so I was more mindful of what position the baby might be in. After Mass, I decided to rearrange my birth bag, which I’d slowly been packing over the past several weeks. Then I laid down to rest while Clare was napping and Brian went to Spar. I wasn’t able to fall asleep, and I could still feel the Braxton Hicks contractions more regularly than the previous days, but nothing too strong. One of our Ministry to Families helpers had offer to come and watch the kids so Brian and I could go on a date. She came at 1pm and we headed out to a restaurant that we had never been to before – apparently it has an awesome panoramic view but it was cloudy and rainy while we were there so we couldn’t see anything. But the food was delicious – it was “deer month” – I had pumpkin cream soup and a big salad with breaded deer filets and roasted chestnuts. We got home from our date a little after 3 PM and I headed out for a walk at 3:30 PM to enjoy the last glimpses of sunlight. Sunset in Gaming was 4:22 PM but the sun disappears behind the foothills even earlier. As I walked, I realized that these contractions were likely more than Braxton Hicks. When they came on, I couldn’t walk through them. They weren’t painful – but I would have to stop and wait until they past to continue walking. I took the same walk that I took most days in my late pregnancy – from our house to the horse stable, into the woods, by the little ponds, behind the fire station, through more woods, behind some houses, up the ‘big hill’ toward the beer well – stopping at the benches with a great view of Gaming. I loved taking these walks during the Fall. It was so beautiful with the leaves changing colors and the Fall temperatures felt great! I normally always listened to podcast, often one from The Birth Hour where a woman shares her birth story. During this walk, I was listening to Birth, Baby, and Life podcast, which I also love – I listened to several episodes, including How to Stay in Control During Childbirth and So, You Want a Faster Labor? I had to take the road home as it was 5 PM and pitch black. When a contraction came on, I’d stare at the moon – which was half full – it definitely felt like something was happening but I still wasn’t sure if this was real labor.

When I got home, the girls were in the bathtub, Brian was making dinner and the boys were at a neighbor’s home playing. I asked Brian to get the boys as well and to bathe them. I told him not to use any more hot water with the boys – as I knew I’d likely want to get in the tub myself and wanted all the hot water 😊 I hung out on the exercise/birthing ball, which felt awesome to sit on, as Brian took care of baths and dinner. At 6:30 PM he put Clare to bed and then brought the other kids up to bed. I started filling the bath tub around then and decided to get in “just to relax” at 7 PM. I put on the same “Birth Worship” playlist that Brian had made for me and that I loved listening to as I labored in the tub with Isaac and Clare. However, the difference this time was I still wasn’t sure I was in real labor. Nothing was painful. I wasn’t tired. I felt like I could stay in the bath relaxing for a long time. At 8 PM Brian checked on me and I told him to check back with every 45 minutes to 1 hour. He said OK, and then popped back in a minute later and asked, “So do you think you’ll be in there for hours?” And I replied that I had no idea. I was definitely having contractions that I had to breathe and blow through. When I felt a tightening come on I would breathe in through my nose and count 1-2-3 as I would sometimes kind of lift my upper body out of the tub, then I would blow out hard, like I was blowing out a huge birthday candle, counting 1-2-3, sometimes I would also dump a cup of water down my belly. I imagined the baby was moving down. In between the contractions, which I never took time to note how far apart they were (oops?!), I would try to figure out what was going on… was I really in labor? they say stay at home as long as you can – and this feels like I could stay here forever, so when will I know? Just before 8:30 PM I felt a small pop as I was blowing out – I had my eyes closed and I envisioned a balloon popping – that’s when I realized my water had just broken – as I felt a gush of water between my legs. It wasn’t a huge gush, but I could definitely feel it. I looked at the water in the bath and it was all still clear (eg, no meconium) and I couldn’t feel anything else leave me (eg, no prolapsed umbilical cord). I waited until the next contraction came and with that one I felt more water come out. I called Brian on WhatsApp at 8:31 PM and he came to the bathroom, where I told him my water had broken, so now I was certain I was in labor (I had still been in disbelief up until this point because I wasn’t in pain and it was three days before my due date). I told him I just wanted him to know and that we might still have a long time to go because with Francis and Ellie my water broke at home and they were born much later. At 8:52 PM I called him again, a short time earlier I had felt a big contraction and my legs were shaking for no reason. I remembered that this could be a sign of transition – but I thought, no – it couldn’t be for me. I still wasn’t in pain. But then I felt pressure in my bum. Oh no! That I thought, is a sign that it could be time to push. So I pulled the plug on the tub, made that call to Brian. I didn’t say anything – I just let it ring knowing he would come – and that he did. I told him what was going on and that he needed to help me get out of the tub. In between contractions, which were very regular, I had to make a plan – which ended up being: get pants, t-shirt, sweatshirt and slippers on. Trying to execute this plan was a bit harder – I could do about one of those things, and then I would dash to the toilet to sit down during the contraction – which was feeling more and more just like pressure in my bum. When I stood up at one point I lost my mucous plug. I prayed out loud, “Jesus, please help us get to the hospital to deliver” – I had heard plenty of stories of birthing on the toilet and I didn’t want that to be me.

I made it down our two flights of stairs and was leaning against the University car (the Blue Skoda) during a contraction deciding where I wanted to sit. I asked Brian to go back in and get my phone. When he got back down, I told him to move the bags in the backseat because I was going to ride back there. The pressure in my bum was intense now when a contraction hit. I got on my knees in the middle seat and rested my head on the head rest. It was a little after 9 PM when we got in the car. It is about a 15-20 minute car ride to the hospital. I had my eyes shut the whole time. That little head rest was my best friend during the trip. I rested my head on it in between contractions. During contractions, I would make the instinctual animal-low tones -- it’s like these noises just escape me – I’m sure they sound like I’m in pain, but I’m not – it’s just what comes out of me – and I remembered from my birth with Clare, that this is how the midwives knew I was ready to push (versus doing a cervical check). So OH NO, here we are in the car and I’m entering the pushing stage. When I wasn’t moaning during a contraction, I would say out loud, “Baby, please stay in” – I resisted any urge to push when I felt the intensity of pressure in my bum increase.

Even though my eyes were closed, I knew the drive to the hospital well enough to know where we were in the drive, as we went down the off-ramp and around the roundabout, I knew we had made it to the hospital. But now I wondered how I would get into the hospital. Brian parked right in front of the hospital and in between two close contractions, I got out of the car. I had to drop to my knees whenever a contraction came. I saw that there was an old lady across the street from us, waiting for the bus. This poor old lady and what she must have thought of us! I made it halfway across the little street in front of the hospital when another contraction hit – so down I dropped to my knees in the middle of the road. I turned my head around and said “a car is coming” – of course it wasn’t, Brian assured me, and I knew he wouldn’t have let me stop there if there was any traffic. It was just the noise of the little creek I was hearing. I barely made it to the sidewalk where the lady was waiting when another contraction hit. She was speaking in German – telling us to get a wheelchair. I saw the front door of the hospital – it was so close, yet so far. I had to go up two small flights of stairs. Brian ran up them and had to hit the buzzer as it was after hours – it was around 9:25 AM he estimates. I got in the doors and dropped to my knees again – letting out a big animal-tone groan. I heard the front desk lady ask if my contractions were 5 minutes apart. Brian said they’re one minute apart. I said, I’m pushing! A male employee appeared with a wheelchair and I thought there was no way I could sit in it – but they got me in and he ran us to the elevator. Up we went 3 floors and into the delivery room – I was howling and having a contraction as we entered the room – I knew the midwife would understand what was happening. I got onto the bed on my knees. But the midwife needed me to lay back to check me. She did and she said the baby was coming. This I knew. I would have loved to get on my knees, but she had me stay on back. She held one leg back and the female doctor came in and held the other leg back. They kept telling me to relax my legs and to “make a place for the baby.” Well this is not a relaxing position — I would have loved to inform her — but at this point I was just trying to follow directions and get baby out. The midwife directed my pushing – telling me to hold my breath, not to moan and to push. This part seemed difficult to me and this is the only part that was painful – not horrible pain – but I wouldn’t have wanted to do it for very long. And that I didn’t. I don’t remember exactly, but I probably pushed 4 or 5 times. I felt his head, followed by his body being born in one long push. And there he was in front of me on the bed. He was born at 9:43 PM. Less than 20 minutes after arriving at the hospital. I was so alert, so happy, and just kept on saying “Thank you, thank you, thank you”. I thanked the midwife, the doctor, God, and just kept saying “thank you” as I pulled Jack onto my chest. I delivered the placenta with no difficulty within the next five minutes or so, and I asked to look at it – I had never been so alert and feeling good following a delivery. The doctor examined me and announced everything was perfect, I had no tears. With Jack on my chest, Brian cut the cord (I don’t remember if that was before or after the placenta was delivered). We had the next two hours with him in the delivery room. For most of that time, I held him and tried to get him to nurse. He did eventually nurse a bit – but wasn’t as quick to take to it as some of my other kids. At some point during that time, the midwife took his measurements and dressed him. Also, a nurse came in and administered a rapid antigen COVID test to Brian and me. I didn’t think much of it since testing is so regular here – and barely even noticed when she returned a few minutes later to tell us that we’re both of negative. I thought it was very fitting we were in the green woods room – as I spent so much time walking in the woods during the last part of pregnancy!

A little after midnight, I stood up and changed into the hospital gown, and pushed Jack in his bassinet down to my hospital room where I’d be staying for the remainder of my time there. Due to COVID regulations, it was not possible for us to pay extra for a private family room, which enabled Brian to stay with me and the baby during Clare and Isaac’s birth. But it worked out well that there was no one else in my double-room when I got there, so I knew at least for the first night I’d have my own space (assuming not too many babies were born after midnight 😊

Brian called me on FaceTime in the morning with Ellie, Francis, Isaac and Clare who were all very excited to see their baby brother. Clare kept saying, “My baby? My baby came out. Hi baby!”

Brian was able to visit from 1:30-4:00 PM, so he came during that time on Sunday. We planned that he would come Monday afternoon and I would go home at that time. BUT then… at 5pm, the nurse came in and asked how long had passed since I had COVID. I told her I hadn’t had COVID – but that I was fully vaccinated. Then I saw a doctor behind her. Keeping his distance – he explained that my PCR COVID results just came back and I was 1 point positive (anything above 30 is considered positive and I got 31). I was shocked! We all were. But everyone at the hospital was very, very calm about it. Obviously I was not their first mom to test positive. I joked with my family and friends that testing positive was the only way I could ensure a private room for the entirety of my stay! And really it did turn into “luxury treatment.” Instead of having me leave the room for the baby check-ups (they meet with a pediatrician, do a hip ultrasound, go for a bath) – all the doctors and nurses came to my room. They did have to wear an extra layer of protection whenever they entered my room, but they never seemed put out by it and were all very, very kind.

This morning (it’s Monday) they administered a PCR COVID test to both Jack and me. Mine was in the nose as usual, but Jack’s was just a mouth swab. They gave me a sheet to sign, explaining that they had informed me that I should wear a mask when nursing Jack and that I should keep his bassinet 1.5 m from my bed. But everyone seemed to acknowledge while that was the written policy, I should just continue what I was doing – nursing Jack in bed with me, letting him sleep with me, not wearing a mask. After all, I was “the pro” this being my fifth baby. And I could tell their approach was that mama and baby were one unit – there was no way they were going to separate us.

So many specific prayer requests I had surrounding this birth were answered. One “tool” I learned listening to my favorite birth story podcast, Birth in God’s Presence, is to take your worst case scenarios/fears surrounding birth and then instead think: “What if God shows up in that situation and changes into a blessing.” So about a month ago, I did just that and during prayer wrote out my “what if’s,” aka, my prayer intentions surrounding this birth.

I now see that God answered my prayers and feel like He exceeded my “what if’s.” Obviously, I tested positive for COVID, but even that He turned into a blessing. And I believe He was protecting me from that much earlier in my pregnancy when I had the desire to be vaccinated. I’m so thankful for my friends who prayed over me and Jack a week or so prior to the birth.

As I’m concluding typing this, it’s now Monday afternoon— the doctor (with great English) just walked in (with no gear on) and announced, “You’re negative!” Jack is as well. She said sometimes you can have an elevated score. I looked at the time - 4:19 PM. As I recently told my spiritual director, that’s my “special” time when I often find myself glancing at the clock and remembering my own birth on April 19. God is good! ❤️

Keeping Up With the Kissingers

Friday, November 26, 2021

Kartause Thanksgiving 🦃

Friday, November 19, 2021

Jack’s Homecoming

Monday, November 15, 2021

Jack’s Birth Story: That Time We Almost Had COVID